This is my life! My randon shity life, w.e. I like, I feel, I find funny.... w.e. I'm going thrugh... my shit, also lifeissimplejustisnoteasy is an awesome person I love my bf, last week I thought we broke up and I really died but no.. so I'm happy and we r offical :-)(edit on jan 23) ummmmmm so i have 2 bloggers and like 5 twitter…. oh and i found my xanga!!! so thats it..
I do things. To prove to myself. You say i wont do something. I do it to prove im not a seterotype. You say i cant I do it to prove i can I do it to prove i am worth it I do it to prove i am good enough No one but me will get in the way of that! Only I can stop myself! And that’s what I prove to myself everyday!
There are many types of bullies, There are cyber bullies, There are bullies at school, The worst bully there is, is yourself. I have been there, I know your pain. I’m the odd man out, I bully myself because no one did. I never gave them the chance. I bullied myself because I had to feel. I was numb, I couldn’t feel, I hid all emotion. I acted like I was okay. No one cared, they all pretended. No one was there when I needed them. THEY SAID THEY WOULD! THEY NEVER CAME! THEY NEVER CARED! No one saw when I was me! THE REAL ME! THEY FEARED ME! THEY JUGDED ME, said I was acting. They didn’t care if they did hurt me, I hurt myself worse. With words, Truth, “You’re not good enough!” “No one cares!” I tried death, I don’t fear death, just what people would say after I died. Pain, I clawed at my skin, No one saw. I stabbed myself, No one stopped me. I WROTE MY PAIN EVERY DAY! They said it was sad, I should write happier. I wrote perfect little stories, Nothing goes wrong. “Aww your stories are so happy, life is not like that.” DON’T YOU THINK I KNOW? I LIVED WITH SELF INFLICTING PAIN FOR FOUR YEARS! MY WHOLE HIGH SCHOOL YEARS! I want it to end! IT ALL COMES BACK! I want to stop, I can’t stop this monster I have become! I can’t stop myself! I WANT TO FORGET MOST OF ALL, YET MY NIGHTMARE LIVES ON, I FEAR EVERY DAY THE ONE PERSON I KNOW CARES THE ONE PERSON THAT MAKES IT ALL GO AWAY, I FEAR ONE DAY HE WILL ONE DAY SLIP THOUGH MY FINGERS. when I am with him, I am not a bully. Just someone that overcame it. Author notes I am no longer depressed, but I everyday judge myself for the pain I put myself though. I thank God for my boyfriend that helps me every day, and for my life. I thank my boyfriend because I would not be here without you. Ialso thank my parents for making me see a shrink until recently, I don’t think it helped much, and I still don’t think you guys really care, but thanks.
Tumblr, we need your help to get the website below to position 1 in google before the 19th of Feb!
Please reblog and you will be loved!
Here is the site: hatstand aardvark biscuit barrel
Also, we will be giving one of the kind rebloggers a copy of our theme: Narnia
(Source: hatstand-aardvark-biscuit-barrel.com, via the-iridescence)
